|photo by J Kendrick|
What a mistake.
As I played, I thought about all of the things I could do with the day that had nothing to do with schedules or meetings. I could edit my second book, work on my new book, design a new cover, start the book video layout, and on an on. I created a wish list a mile long - I wish I had enough time to work on these things I love. This thought bounced around my head the whole morning. I wish, I wish, I wish.
When I surfaced and looked at the clock, I realized I needed to get out of the house in 20 minutes.
I had wasted my free time.
Now, there is a part of me that denies that - the part of me that believes I needed to tune out any productive thoughts so that I could recover from a burst of activity that had started in August and has yet to let up.
But I know better.
I only wasted a couple of hours, but I could have done some editing on my second book instead of shopping the Kindle store. I might have gotten a great first draft of a cover finished instead of looking up when Downton Abbey's new season starts. (January 6, 2013, if you're curious.) I could have searched for the style of music I have in mind for the book video instead of creating a new channel on Pandora.
So what did I learn from this?
I need to shift how I think about my time. No, I don't need to be productive all of the time. But would a 30 minute tune-out been enough to get me back on track? Probably. I could have still worked on my book to do list. And I should have, because that is what I love. Even though it is work, it recharges me and makes me smile. My attitude for the rest of the day would have been one of happy accomplishment, and I wouldn't have had that feeling that time escaped me just as I was trying to control it and use it to make me feel better.
In the end, I did what I thought I should do to recharge while ignoring what I really needed. Did it help? Not so much. Lesson learned.